Highlights of my day thus far...

1. Overhearing a customer refer to her infant son as "my lil drunken sailor."

2. Having a cheeseburger splat on my windshield after it was thrown out the window of a vehicle with a bumper sticker that read "No Jesus No Peace." Perhaps this cheeseburger was thrown in a peaceful manner.

3. Breaking a $100,000 piece of equipment at work right as the boss walks in the door. 

4. Jimmy Johns